Monday, April 29, 2013

The Hail Mary Or As Jets Fans Call It - The Tebow Year

Cue the ending theme song from "The Incredible Hulk"

So a little over a year ago, your humble blogger extraordinaire introduced  the world to The Spector Sector and with that initial foray into the world of online opinion spewing came the story of the day, which was that the New York Jets traded their 4th round draft pick to the Denver Broncos for quarterback Tim Tebow.  Fast forward to present day and we can see how the mighty, err I mean how the weak have continued to dig their shithole further into the ground as the New York Jets announced today that they have released Tim Tebow. 

This is a story that would even make Hunter S. Thompson do a double and perhaps a triple take but nevertheless it’s the truth.  They say that truth is stranger than fiction and the very same could be said of this man made drama, and yes that’s pretty much what it was.  What else could it have been?  Tebow, cost the Jets a 4th round pick, $1.5 million clams, plus the $2.5 million clams they sent John Elway to just pry his death grip off Tebow’s contract.  And what pray tell did the Jets get out of this deal you ask?  Tebow took about 70 snaps on offense.  He was 6 for 8 in passing for 39 yards.  He ran the ball 32 times for 102 yards.  No touchdowns.  No bended knee glory shots post touchdowns.  No glory whatsoever.  All in all, just a shit bang of a deal.  Thanks Tannenbaum.

I don’t blame Tebow, he is what he is.  The thing is, I wish I friggin knew what he is or was.  He could very well be just another really good college football quarterback that earned the spotlight during his collegiate years; he did win the Heisman.  That’s no easy task but not one that always translates into NFL readiness.  He was never really given a fair chance though whether the excuse was his inability or the fact that Mark Sanchez earns about 50 gillion a year and still finds it necessary to shove his head up his centers ass.  We can’t have talent like that riding the pine can we?
Sanchez: "I'm looking for my talent.
Brandon Moore: "MY PANCREAS!"

So what was the point of bringing Tebow here in the first place?  Was it to light a fire under Sanchez with the primal fear that he could lose his job to Tebow at any given moment?  Yeah, that didn’t happen.  Perhaps it was the conspiratorial idea that Tebow was here to give the team some buzz?  Yeah because nothing spells great buzz like having a born-again, who lives a clean, religious and pious life.  How the tabloids didn’t salivate at having that as their icon of attention I’ll never know.  And by no means do I fault the man for his lifestyle, just the boobs who think he was here to sell something beyond playing the game.  

The Jets released a statement today with a quote from head coach Rex “Tinactin Toes” Ryan saying:

“We have a great deal of respect for Tim Tebow,” Ryan said in the statement. “Unfortunately, things did not work out the way we all had hoped. Tim is an extremely hard worker, evident by the shape he came back in this offseason. We wish him the best moving forward.”

Well there you have it, everything explained in one succinct statement from the guy who’s deep in the know.  Don’t you feel so much more hopeful for the future of the Jets now?  I sure know I do!

The Jets trading for Tim Tebow makes about as much sense as this video.  You’re welcome by the way Rex.

No comments:

Post a Comment